Homestuck, the Thing You Aren’t Reading – Toren

For those of you who aren’t aware, which seems to be everyone in Talons I’ve talked to, Homestuck is a thing.

It’s a good thing too.

Homestuck is the most popular web comic ever made. It’s also the longest. It has the largest fan base the most complex plot, the largest art and music teams and the most in comic flash videos.

Whatever you’re reading, this is better.

^She's so frustrated she's throwing her hat down so hard her mustache falls off.

I tell people this and find that I have them totaling convinced they want to read it, and then not read it. Or only read 20 pages. I think this can be mostly attributed to the first act. The first act is slow and mostly boring, which tries to establish the characters and what normal life is like for them. Its 100 pages of conversations between people you don’t know or care about, talking about things that aren’t necessarily all that interesting. They are important to the plot later on, but you don’t know that and there’s not much reason to pay attention. Once you hit Act Two though, things speed up dramatically and you have to actually work to understand all that’s happening. Most people don’t make it that far.

Generally they’re “too busy”. You are never too busy. That’s stupid. If you have an hour or more leisure, read Homestuck. It’s that good.

Trying not to be redundant here, the story starts simply with a few little animations and fairly boring art and then gradually accelerates with more exciting things, plot twists, characters and much better videos. This continues until the story is screaming through plot and the teenagers are blowing up suns with bombs made of their own collapsing universes. Every detail is important, and the more you pay attention the more you appreciate what happens later.

Now since I’m tired of writing and I could say that the more people opinions you’re hearing the stronger my argument, I hired my middle school friend James to write his own commentary.

James’s stuff is below.

At the risk of sounding like every other person who has ever read Homestuck; Homestuck is an amazing piece of literature, which combines that aspect of a story, a game, a puzzle, as well as a miniature cartoon.

Homestuck is a marvelous tale that started in 2009 about a young lad and three of his friends, who decide to play a game. Since then, it has–

Alright, so I realized this is a lot like an essay and Toren is telling me I’m supposed to “be all cool” and the “hip dood” who is “walking the streats” so I guess I’ll start over. Here goes.

You guys should read it. All of you. In fact, I’m surprised you guys haven’t, this story has, what, billions of readers? Okay, I’m lying, I don’t know how many readers there are, but I’m sure it’s something like 10% of the population. The story has so many plot points, is well written, and has so much humour that I’m surprised that my mouth hasn’t filed legal papers to part with my face, because of too much happy. Liquid happy. The kind that sprays out of your mouth and ears when you feel too good. Some people call it liquid rainbows because of its multi-coloured look and it seems to be an ongoing meme or something, but the technical term is Liquid Happy. Anyways, back to topic, The story and seven “acts”, like in a play, five of which are completed (five was split into two parts because it was so massive) and act six has just begun.

I’m not quite sure what else I’m supposed to be writing here. This essay-like thing has hardly been edited, and is in the order of what came out of my head.  When Toren said to make a commentary I didn’t know what a commentary is, I’m kind of winging it. Is this too long? Is this going on the blog? Will people read this? Will normal people read this? These thoughts are running through my head but it doesn’t matter, what matters is Homestuck, what I’m here to talk about. I think Toren covered most of it and I’m just here as a guy who has opinions that don’t matter to make this more important. I don’t even know three people in Talons, and this is going on a Talons blog right? Whatever, read it guys. He’s not kidding, it’s good. The fanbase is massive, so massive in fact that unsavory fanfics and fanarts have arose. No more details. You said casual and walking the streats, Toren. Here you go.

 

 

In the comic this would be an animated gif in which the small plush dragon bounces on the dead boys face.

Toren’s writing again.

There. Evidence. Other people like it too. Also my blog post is now double its original length.

Now go! Kill a weekend! Get through Act 1! Seriously. Please.